- Being rather than doing. The end goal is to become a person who actually is a certain way and not just a person who behaves in certain ways in an attempt to solicit specific responses from other people. Become a person with an attractive personality, don't just act like one.
- People are drawn to authenticity. Thus if you are acting instead of being, you will come off an being unauthentic and people will be turned off by this. They will sense that you are just doing or saying something for the purpose of getting something back in return.
- Blindly acting and following arbitrary 'rules' without any regard to situational context will never get you any long term results.
- It’s not necessarily what you do, but how and why you do it. It’s not just what you verbally say or what your actions communicate, but how and why you say it. The how being the emotions that you communicate and the why being the place where it comes from (your underlying intent).
- We are afraid of communicating or showing our real selves to others because it exposes our true self to be open to rejection. It’s easier to put on a fake persona so that you can rationalize that another person is not really rejecting the real you. You can rationalize that the persona that a book told you to put on, or the tips and tricks that it gave you are the things which are being rejected, and not the real you is.
- We need to address the deep underlying insecurities upon which your behaviors are based, while simultaneously bringing awareness to these behaviors and developing an understanding of what they are communicating.
This is done in two parts:
Part 1: Teaching effective communication behaviors and bringing awareness to what unattractive behaviors that you are unconsciously communicating. So that you can immediately start consciously addressing them and improving your results.
Part 2: Addressing the internal personal belief system that you have about yourself and the world which is causing these unattractive behaviors to show in the first place.
Social skills, like any other skill, can be improved through practice and improving one's understanding of the underlying theory.
Topics Cover in this Course:
Personal Identity - How you view yourself, the world, and your place in it. These are the core internal factors from where all your external behaviors are derived.
Frame Control - The outer projection of your inner beliefs, and the perspective from which a situation is assessed.
Self-Qualifying - Giving away your power by falling into other people's frames and values systems and seeking their approval.
Honest Intent + Outcome Independence - The key to having a positive, effective, and authentic interaction. You communicate what you honestly desire and think while simultaneously showing that your emotional state is not dependent on the outcome of the interaction.
Abundance Mentality - Abundance vs. scarcity mindsets. It is crucial it is to come into interactions with an abundance mentality and view the world as being filled with a continuum of opportunities and not just singular one-off lucky chances.
Communicating Emotions - Underlying emotions drive most all of our actions. We simultaneously communicate on both emotional and logical levels. We need to be aware of what we are emotionally communicating and not just the logical words that we are saying. Emotions are the medium through which connections are developed.
Confidence, Congruence, Consistency - The three core personality traits on which others base their initial and long-term impressions of you.
Establishing Rapport - How to properly establish a rapport with someone, and the right-way to initiate a conversation.
Authenticity - Why people are drawn towards authenticity and people who embody it.